JokesA guy walks into to bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking it, the monkey jumps around all over the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some limes and eats them; he then jumps onto the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.
The Bartender screamed at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?" "No, what?" said the guy. "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table, whole!" said the bartender. "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the patron. "He eats everything in sight, the little jerk. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finished his drink, paid the bill and left the bar.
Two weeks later, he's in the bar again and his monkey is with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around. While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey just did?" he asked. "Now what?" inquires the patron. "Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it." says the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats everything in sight, but since he swallowed the cue ball, he measures everything first."
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