JokesHow to tell when you're in Southern California:
Your co-worker tells you he/she has 8 body piercings...and none is visible.
You make over $250,000 and still can't afford a house.
You take a bus and are shocked at 2 people carrying on a conversation in English. NOTE: Difficult to verify as very few Southern Californians have ever actually taken a bus.
Your child's 3rd grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring and is named Breeze.
You can't remember ... is pot illegal?
You've been to more than one baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.
You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown and can taste the difference between Sumatra and Ethiopian. You also know which Brentwood restaurant serves the freshest Arugula.
A really great parking space can move you to tears.
A low-speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.
You assume every company offers domestic partner benefits, a fab exercise facility and tofu takeout.
You're thinking of taking an adult class but you can't decide between aromatherapy and conversational Mandarin.
Your best friends just named their twins after her acting coach and his personal trainer.
Gas costs 50 cents a gallon more than anywhere else in the United States.
A man walks on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps. You don't notice.
A woman walks on the bus with live poultry. You don't notice.
Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 in the morning at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like
George Clooney IS George Clooney.
Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.
The gym is packed at 3pm...on a work day.
If one more relative from back home asks you to take him to Disneyland, Universal
Studios and a drive through Beverly Hills to see Julia Roberts' house,
The work day starts at 10am...or whenever you get out of your therapy session.
Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who delivers your mail is into BDSM and your Mary Kay
Cosmetic Lady is a guy In drag.
It's sprinkling and there's a report on every news station about "STORM WATCH '00"
You call 911 and they put you on hold.
You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Blanks himself is teaching the 4:30 Tae-bo class.
Your paperboy has a two picture deal.
The three hour traffic jam you just sat through wasn't a pile-up... but by everyone slowing to rubberneck at a lost shoe laying on the shoulder.
Send
Jokes